Dec 7, 2013

Sometimes, I write funny things, but it's been a while.

But mostly, it's my sister Hannah who is funny.  We were laughing so much we couldn't breath.  (As much as semi and full asian women can while wheezing quietly. That's how we laugh hard.)  You will want to read and watch all of this.  Hannah and her co-workers purchased Siamese Fish, which also included the contest of which department will live the longest.  (They even wrote up rules about sabotage others fish.  No foul play was allowed.)  Her department's fish died.  

LOGAN, UT - It is with great sorrow, that we announce the death of the Textbook fish Perseus, who entered his watery grave somewhere between the hours of 5pm Monday and 8am Tuesday morning. It was not our wish that he go alone, but it was on his terms and we find comfort in that. Perseus was a fun loving fish, who had a special relationship with his plant, Plant. He loved to swim and frolic among the leaves that Plant so willingly offered.

Some months ago, Perseus developed a condition called swim bladder, which essentially means that he could not poop and was constantly constipated. This resulted in bloatedness which caused him to float unwillingly to the top of his tank. Try as he might, he could not propel his enlarged body to the bottom of the tank to visit Plant.

Perseus endured, however, once we found that he thrived on a diet of thawed frozen, mashed peas. The peas expedited the digestion and allowed him to swim gleefully among Plant’s leaves once more. It was never enough, though, the peas sustained him only temporarily. Still, he survived…perhaps to teach us some lesson or pass on some valuable knowledge. Either way, he was well loved and shall be missed.

Perseus is survived by his Campus Store fish family, Juan Pablo of Operations, Pita of General Merchandise, Larry of the Regionals, and Pepper of Marketing and Admin. He is preceded in death by Plant.

Services for Perseus will be held Wednesday morning at 8:25 in the Financial Aid Women’s Restroom. In leiu of flowers, the textbook family asks that delicious treats be donated in Perseus’ name. Please enjoy this video tribute to Persues, the Textbooky Fish.

 A Later Memo that she sent out for work. 

Textbooks had a moving service for Perseus this morning. And since most of you were unable to make it, here is a photo…and for your viewing pleasure, a video is attached, as well.

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